#1: Stage Names / Allah Smotherous

First post here on this new thing. Enjoy.

Today I thought about Emilio Estevez. Yeah, I can't figure out why either. I've never been a fan of his. I've only seen him in was The Breakfast Club and maybe five minutes of Men At Work. I then recalled how Charlie Sheen was in that movie and how HIS career seems to be doing okay. Then I remembered...that they're brothers. Martin Sheen shot both Emilio and Charlie out of his pee-pee.

So then I start wondering who changed their name. Thinking Emilio changed it because Estevez seemed strangely catchy. And I was wrong. It was the others.

Ramón Gerardo Antonio Estévez fathered Emilio and Carlos Irwin Estévez. Ramon took the name Martin Sheen because he expected a better reception for an Irish name than a Hispanic name. Carlos Irwin later changed his name to Charlie Sheen.

Then I started thinking about all the other stage names out there and why those names were chosen. The Screen Actors Guild doesn not allow two actors to have the same name. For instance, Batman, was played by Michael Douglas, who had to change his name to Michael Keaton. Why Keaton? He admired Diane Keaton, who changed her name from Diane Hall.

Possible discrimination is another reason to change names. Farrokh Bulsara wanted to hide his heritage. So he changed his name to Freddie Mercury. Natalie Portman was Natalie Hershlag. Hershlag sounds like it might taste good. Whatever it is.

(Side-thought: Two famous people get married, both have stage names, what names do THEY call each other by?)

I doubt Maurice Joseph Micklewhite's career would've taken off as it did, or would've ever become everyone's favorite butler (no, not Mr. Belvedere) if he hadn't changed his name to Michael Caine. He changed his name to Michael because he preferred the sound of it. The last name came to him suddenly when pressured to come up with his stage name. He looked at a movie poster and that was it. The Caine Mutiny was in theaters at the time. "Had I looked the other direction," he later said, "I'd be known as Michael The One Hundred and One Dalmatians."

So I've decided that I'm going to change my name and hopefully my career will take off. Allah Smotherous (or maybe Cringlebert Fistcheebuns). That's got a nice ring to it. Yes...it's all coming together. Here's a list of other stage names and their former with a nice "stage name clip" for Engelbert Humperdinck:

Woody Allen - Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Jennifer Aniston - Jennifer Anastassakis
Pat Benatar — Patricia Mae Andrzejewski
Frank Black — Charles Michael Kitridge Thompson IV
Michael Ian Black — Michael Schwarz
Jon Bon Jovi — John Francis Bongiovi
Bono — Paul David Hewson
David Bowie — David Robert Jones
Charles Bronson — Charles Buchinski
Mel Brooks — Melvin Kaminsky
Nicolas Cage — Nicholas Kim Coppola...yes, that COPPOLA
Vikki Carr - Florencia Bisenta de Casillas Martinez Cardona
Chevy Chase — Cornelius Crane Chase
Patsy Cline — Virginia Patterson Hensley
Elvis Costello - Declan Patrick McManus
Vin Diesel — Mark Vincent
Carmen Electra — Tara Leigh Patrick (What did Dave Navarro call her?)
Flavor Flav — William Drayton
Edward Furlong - Edward Walter Torres
Whoopi Goldberg — Caryn Elaine Johnson
MC Hammer — Stanley Kirk Burrell
Benny Hill - Alfred Hawthorn Hill
Bob Hope — Leslie Townes Hope
Engelbert Humperdinck — Arnold George Dorsey
Billy Idol — William Michael Albert Broad
Jenna Jameson — Jennifer Marie Massoli
Sir Elton John — Reginald Kenneth Dwight
Ashley Judd - Ashley Tyler Ciminella
Bruce Lee — Lee Jun-fan
Huey Lewis — Hugh Anthony Cregg III
Chuck Norris — Carlos Ray Norris
Ozzy Osbourne — Jonathan Michael Osborne
Lou Diamond Phillips — Louis Upchurch
Seal — Sealhenry Olusegun Olumide Samuel
Shaggy — Orville Richard Burrell
Sisqó — Mark Althavan Andrews
Nikki Sixx — Frank Carlton Serafino Ferrana
Ringo Starr — Richard Starkey
Shania Twain — Eilleen Regina Edwards
Eddie Vedder — Edward Louis Seversen III
Dita Von Teese — Heather Sweet
Christopher Walken - Ronald Walken (!)
Gene Wilder - Jerome Silberman
Stevie Wonder - Steveland Hardaway Judkins

Yeah, Allah Smotherous works.